Yakuza

When I was 16, I fell in love with Chad, and older guy from another high school. Nine months later, we lost our virginity together. Three months after that, he decided he wanted to date other girls when he went off to college, so we broke up.

Fast-forward ten years. I was newly divorced, and Chad tracked me down on a high school reunion website. Said he'd never forgotten me, still loved me, wanted to see me. I thought, what the hell, maybe it could be some long-lost-love fairy tale. So I invited him to come visit me.

The sex was good, I have to give him that. Ten years of practice made a world of difference for both of us. But in the course of that weekend visit, he told me about his past decade. He'd spent several years in Japan, teaching English. He got involved with several of his students, one of whom was married. To a member of the Japanese mafia. Apparently the Yakuza don't take kindly to American playboys sleeping with their women. So, he had to leave the country with only the clothes on his back within a matter of hours, without even returning to his apartment of two years. That's right people, I was sleeping with a guy who had to flee a country under threat of dire bodily harm a few months earlier. Always a nice feeling, knowing you're hanging out with a guy who's under a death threat.

He then goes on to tell me that another woman he was involved with there is claiming to be pregnant, with his twins. But, hey, everyone makes mistakes, right? So I decide to overlook these things, and listen to his proclamations of love that never died. I go home to the small town from whence we sprung, and spend Thanksgiving with him. Things are going fine, until he tells me he and his family are planning a wedding for us in six months. What!?!?!?! Since when are we getting married, I wonder? Silly me though, I brush it off, and hope that by avoiding the subject, it will go away. I return to my home, and we continue our relationship by phone.

He soon tells me he's got a great job lined up, and that I will soon be able to quit my job and stay home to have babies. What is this wonderful new job? He accepted a sales job with Phillip Morris. "The cigarette company?” I ask. "Yes, but I'll be selling something else, they have lots of other products", he tells me. A few days later, well, he says he will be selling cancer sticks after all. I know without a doubt that I cannot live my life supported by the tobacco industry.

He starts talking marriage again, wanting to make those June wedding plans. I say, let's slow down, I've only been divorced a year, I want to see other people still. He gets furious, and says it's all over then. Sends me some hate-email, and is gone from my life. To go marry the Japanese woman who is bearing his twins. Because if he can't have me, he knows he'll never find love, so he might as well go marry her and at least legitimize the kids.

I still wonder if the Yakuza ever got him when he went back to Japan to get hitched.


Update 6/11 - I had lunch with him over the holidays. He went back to Japan, got married, had 3 kids (who are all models in Japan), divorced, and has had a string of non-monogamous relationships ever since. But he also got a great job and makes tons of money, so he can afford to be a playboy. And over lunch, he tearfully told me I'm still the only woman he's ever loved, and asked me to move to Japan to be with him. 20 years later, and he's still pining for me. Flattering? A little. But mostly just sad - for his ex wife, his kids, and all those women he's using. He emails me from time to time to tell me how much he loves me, and how glad he is for our eternal bond. At least I know that if nothing else works out, I can always go back to my first love... but then again, maybe being single isn't so bad.