...but I do have lunch with them sometimes. Seems like most of the men who are attracted to me are married. Or much younger. My age...rarely. And the married ones are usually my dad's age, or thereabouts. How am I supposed to find the Love of My Life and Father of My Children when the ones that want me are already married and have kids of their own?
For instance, there's "Terry". About 54, looks like Robert Redford, has kids my age. We've taken some classes together, volunteered at same functions, and become friends. He is married, but unhappily. Surprise surprise. A couple of years ago, we had a conversation about our friendship, in which we professed a mutual attraction, but agreed that it was not to be acted upon. He's married - I want a man all to myself. He's getting up there into an age range where prostate problems and other such adventures are a reality - I want a guy who can have lots of sex and still run around with the babies (if and when I have them). But we agreed to maintain our friendship on a platonic level. Terry has asked me for coaching on reviving his relationship with his wife. Last time a guy did that, I ended up in bed with him, but that's a different story for another day. Needless to say, my advice didn't work. So now Terry and his wife are going to separate - eventually. Been hearing that one for a while. So from time to time he calls me and asks if he can take me to lunch or dinner or coffee "just to catch up". Or sometimes it's because he has a "small gift" for me. In order to keep things on the friend level, I generally try to refuse his gifts, and pay for myself. Not always successful at that.
The other day on a plane a guy next to me said, kind of out of the blue, "I'll bet married guys LOVE you". I was shocked. "How did you know?", I asked. He wouldn't tell me! "Do I have some kind of tattoo on my forehead that says I'm a tramp and want to ruin your marriage?" Still, he just laughed. He asked if I date married men. I said that I don't, but do have a married male friend who I eat lunch with occasionally. He laughed some more. Oh, and by the way, this guy is married. And he kept trying to hold my hand. Jees.
So, on Monday, I'm having lunch with Terry. But it's not a date, I swear!
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11 comments:
What was the small gift??? mmmm?
Well, last XMas it was a bunch of Starbucks treats. Then it was a nice set of S&P shakers. When I moved into my house it was a $100 Home Depot gift card. As for this XMas, we shall see on Monday. Satisfied?
Wow! Such a interesting story! I have similar issues in the dating world except I keep finding women who DON'T want to have children. I so about having a family that I picked out my car because it had enhance car seat safety for the kids I don't have and righteous seat warmer for the wife I've not yet met.
The world is an interesting place to be...
Well, to make it more interesting, even the married ones usually say they will divorce their wives and give me babies. Great. Just what I want. A guy who will leave his wife for some young blonde chippy.
Of course, makes you wonder how many times he's done (or will do) that!
So are you the living avatar of the Goddess Venus or what?
P.S. Yes, I never sleep...
Chippy. I like it.
Not Venus, just your typical all-American, girl next door type who doesn't look her age. I'm 31 and still get carded regularly.
Dear Chippy,
You remind me of my sister's friend Shannon who looks a lot like you, is the same age as you and has the same nice sweet disposition and can't find a good man! She's like the last one single of her friends, and she recently got set up on a blind date with George "Star Wars" Lucas! She went just to meet him, but he's divorced with kids and a couple of years older than her parents. He wants to see her again, but she's not really interested. Go figure.
Gads! What's up with decent women (and men) who are single??? I too am single and by all accounts decent! Gads!
Of course, I'm taking a break from dating, getting my ducks in a row and all that. but still! Its the principle of the matter!
It's simple. Women seem to be inherently attracted to men who have already received the "seal of approval" from another woman.
In this case, a wedding band is that "seal". Maybe it's subconcious, but you might be making yourself more "available" when you see that ring?
Kind of saves on the "commitment" thing too.
Well, I think in my case it's more that I am not worried about trying to impress them, since they're already "taken", and so I am free to just be myself. Maybe that lack of pretense or inhibition is attractive.
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